Last night Chandler had his first school dance. I know, he's only 12, but he's in Leadership at school and they plan all the dances. I think it's nice for him to be able to go to the things he works so hard on, besides that, it's not like he's going to go anywhere near a girl!
Anyway... I was surprised last night when I asked him which of his friends were going and he said none. I said, "Oh really? Who are you going to hang out with?" He said he didn't know but that he was sure someone would be there. I thought that it was so cool that he wasn't going to give up having a good time just because his friends weren't going! I always worry about him "following the pack", but clearly he does what he wants to do. (Let's hope he continues to want to do good things!)
I dropped him off at the school at 6, but instead of driving back at 8:30 I decided to walk down to the school to get him. I met him out front and we went to Foster's Freeze. We sat outside, ate ice cream and talked for an hour! It was so wonderful! He told me all about the dance and how much fun he had. He said that he was actually kind of glad that none of his friends were there because it gave him the opportunity to get to know some other people a little better. He loves his friends, it was just fun to hang out with other people sometimes.
I had asked him before the school year started if he would make a promise to talk to me. If he would talk, I would listen. It was so great last night to see that actually happening. We walked home and I thought about how easy it would have been for me to have just taken the car to pick him up. The trip would have lasted 2 minutes and we probably would have only chatted for a second. But because I took the time, not only did I get some good exercise, but some real quality time with my son. I am always so worried about him becoming a teenager and being impossible to talk to, but I'm hoping that if I continue to keep the lines of communication open and I keep taking the time to allow him to talk that we may survive those years after all. I know it will be difficult, but last night gave me a big glimmer of hope. :)